Why we don't do it…                           On the contrary…

You “know” the other person needs to hear the negative things to improve	\      Negativity improves nothing. And no one can truly “know” exactly what another person needs. It’s not up to you to judge.
\      There is such a thing as too many positives and it makes me feel submissive/powerless	\      Boosting someone else will NEVER make you worse off. As long as you’re sincere, you can never be too positive about someone.
\      I already compliment him/her enough	\      Chances are you don’t. And who defines “enough”? A person should get significantly more praise from their loved ones than anyone else in their life.
\      It’s good for me to get out all the negative things I’m feeling toward him/her	\      Not to their face. Yes, get the negatives things out, go for a jog, write down your feelings or put in some head phones but let it dissipate privately. Then whatever feelings persist, present them using “I” statements (see below).
\      He/she doesn’t have enough positive things for me to comment on	\      You probably don’t either. Take time to seek them out and you'll find more than you realized.
\      He/she doesn’t follow the rule	\      Be proactive NOT reactive. If you’re always waiting on the other person to make the first positive move then you’ll be waiting a long time. And it’s contagious so if you start then chances are they’ll catch on.

“I” Statements

From the marriage handbook created by StrongerMarriage.org:

“I” statements can be combined with a specific focus on the behavior. Labeling a person can

quickly make that person defensive and upset. See how these are different:

\      “You’re such a slob,” vs. “I’d like it if you’d remember to put the wet towels in the hamper.”

\      “You’re thoughtless,” vs. “I feel really sad that you forgot our anniversary.”

\      “You never help with the children,” vs. “I’d feel much less stressed if you helped with the children’s bedtime routine.”